Tito Ben, Tito Alfredo, Tito
Vicente, Tito Ricardo, Tita Billa, Tita Dulce, Tita Jocelyn, Tito Armando, Tito
Ronilo, and my father, is ninth among siblings of ten. In my mother’s side,
they are also composing a big family. They are six siblings, all girls, namely:
Tita Jocelyn, Mama Jenny (my mom), Tita Emma, Tita Norma, Tita Rose, and Tita
Nora. Both of my parents came from a quite big family, aren’t they? Well,
having five, ten, a dozen or more children is a norm in the society way back to
the old times here in the Philippines. I think it has been a tradition in our
country already because, we Filipinos, believe in the saying, “The more, the
merrier”. Basically, it means, the more the people there is, the happier we
become or simply, the more we have of a certain thing, makes us happier.
But does the number of the family
member or the family size affects how happy the family is? If the family is
composed only of five members, does that mean that they can’t be happy, can
they be? Does having a big family make it a keynote to achieve family
fulfillment?
In my past posts, we've discussed
about the number, specifically age as a factor in life of an individual. We
also have talked about the age as a factor in a couple’s relationship, and now,
I will tackle about the number as the size of the family and how it affects the
happiness of the family.
There is an article entitled, “For Happiness, Seek
Family, Not Fortune”
by Salynn Boyles, WebMD Health News. It is stated in that article that a good
family relationships produce major happiness compared to the happiness high
income can offer. According to the article, a study was conducted to determine
whether money or family relationships made a family more contented and happier.
It was also stated accordingly that a strong family connection turned out to be
the better happiness predictor than that of the income or money. Rich families
might say that they can buy anything, even happiness. But that’s not true.
Having a good family tie is priceless and cannot be bought by money. It has to
be worked on with.
"Much of the
research on money and happiness has shown a strong association up to the point
where basic needs are met, and that is what we found," Rebecca
J. North, researcher from the University of Texas at Austin. "But after this
point income has a diminishing impact on happiness. While happiness
was strongly tied to changes in the quality of family relationships over time,
it was much less strongly tied to changes in income. "
For
me, having a good relationship with the family is much more important. But
let’s admit that money plays a role also. Without money, the parents won’t be
able to provide the needs of each member. And at times, money has been one of
the reasons for a rift within the family to happen, resulting into an unhealthy
family relationship. One more thing is true; the bigger the family, the more
money is needed.
In
that case, what would you prefer, a bigger family or a smaller family? Well,
nowadays, small families are the ideal. However, in the article “The truth about big
families” by Clare
Horsfall, having a big family is so much fun. There are more people, there are
more laugh. Another thing is parents of big families appreciate small things
about life. I think the greatest advantage of having a big family is that when
the parents grow old, there are a lot of people who will take care of them. As
for the children’s side, they are many to help in solving whatever problem is
there to be faced, that is the essence of having siblings.
Horsfall said, “Expenses may grow, but so does the love. Of course children become more expensive as they get older
and parents have to make sacrifices. A mother of a big family might not spend
her days getting a manicure and shopping the credit card away – but wouldn’t
you trade all these things for a beautiful new person?” This means family is more
important than any luxurious things. These lavish things are just nothing and
less important compared to a family member.
So as
Horsfall said, I also value much my family than any other things. I am not from
a rich family, but our family is rich with love. Of course, misunderstandings
are unavoidable, but we can overcome those chaos.
Being engaged in either big or small
families is indeed a good thing. You can be happy whatever family size you are
into. What matters is how you, members of the family, drive your own family
even though the family is defined differently nowadays. The happiness of a
family is immeasurable by money. Worldly stuff has nothing big to do with a
happy family, though at some point, it did. What makes a family happy and
contented? Have communication. Each member of family needs to be loved and
understood, thus having a communication within your own family. Also, have a
valuable time to be spent with the family. Being together for at most times
makes the members of the family more bonded and close. When making some
decision regarding family matters, each member should play a role. Each one’s
sentiment should be considered, that is the essence of being a part of family.
One more thing that has to be considered that is—acceptance. In a family,
everyone is unique, everyone carries diverse personality. Hence, the acceptance
and respect gained in each member is very significant. A happy family
understands the differences of each member and the imperfections of each. The
family size simply determines whether a family is big or small, but it actually
doesn’t have to do with the happiness and contentment within the family.
Happiness and contentment are not distinguish by the number of family members
but are defined by the good relationship they are sharing.
0 comments :
Post a Comment