Blogpost 5: Older Partner? Why Not?

In accordance to my previous post about entitled “Does Age Really Matter?” wherein we discussed the first part about the significance of age in a relationship. In this post, I will tackle the second part of my topic. Does age really matter? If not, to whom would you entrust your future life? To an optimistic and adventurous younger partner or to a stable, experienced old one?

Have you heard of the sugar daddy or sugar mommy before? For me, it sounds nasty at first, but when I have been a grown-up, I finally understood these things. I think having a sugar mommy or sugar daddy does not necessarily mean that you are, let’s say  you are a woman, mistress and its counterpart, and something similar to that, but instead, I recognize it as the love affair or relationship between two people of different age bracket. For me, being in a relationship with someone older than you are is a challenge. Challenge in the sense that since you came from different age bracket, you have a diverse wants and needs. But who’s more benefitted in this kind of commitment, the younger woman with an older hubby or an older woman with “baby” husband?

There is an article entitled “What Are the Advantages of Older Men Dating Younger Women?” by R.A. Anderson. According to this article, age gaps in relationship may cause some troubles to both partners. The fact that the couple came from a different age bracket, it is presumable that they would have disparity in a lot of things like values, wants and needs, priorities, and way of life as well. However, this type of relationship also has its advantages to each. That will only happen when the couple has already solved their differences. If the partners have already settle things up, then there is no more difference between this kind of commitment and the usual one.

 

According to Anderson, “For older men who spent their younger years building their careers or who spent time with partners who did not want children, younger women can provide the opportunity to start families. Although older men might find the challenge of parenthood more physically straining than younger men, an older father can offer his children and partner maturity and wisdom.” 

Generally, older men are more ready to settle down and build his family compared to the younger ones. This means that an older man is ready to have a stable life with whoever their partner is, unlike the young men, and will surely be a good father and partner because of his experiences and maturity. 

In addition, older men who enjoy doing re-creational stuff tend to look for younger women to be with, for old women don’t have any interest doing such stuff. It was also stated there that old men has longer life and living a healthy lifestyle because of dating younger women. Of course, if the person you are always with is young, there comes the feeling of youth. Definitely, you’ll feel as well, resulting in a more healthy living.

Being with someone who is not around your age has also an advantage. With that situation, both parties may enjoy the different perception that their partners have. The older man may be energized and feel enthusiasm by his partners youthful vigor. On the other hand, a younger woman may enjoy her partner’s wide point of view, being a mature person.

Another article entitled “Why Successful Women Love to Date Younger Men”, by Rebecca Marquis, women matures at the age of 32 while men do at 43 which makes women date younger guys. If a woman is already successful in her career and chose a man with age like hers, she would expect much from him. Unlike the younger ones, whom she knows had no established success yet, less expectation there would be. Instead, a woman would be more likely to help the man achieve his goals.

Marquis added, “Women who focus on their careers may put off parenthood until the clock starts ticking. And at that point, they are likely very conscious of whom they would consider being the father of their children. To put it simply, they are doing the math. And they are rounding up. "If he's 45 now, by the time we have kids he'll be almost 50. So by the time the kids are in college, he'll be about 70." If she's barely comfortable with her own age as it relates to parenthood, she's not going to be comfortable choosing a partner who is even older.” This means, successful women tend to look for a younger partner for the sake of their future children. Of course, if a woman is old already, the tendency is to look for a younger husband that may take care of their future children, when she’s already old at least her husband is still young who will after their children.  

Personally, I like dating women who are older than I am, but not too old. I don’t know what exactly the reason is, but whenever I’m with them, I feel like I am baby boy who’s being taken care of by his mother. It is obvious that younger men are very energetic and optimistic. Unlike the older men, young men don’t have so much limitation in doing things because of their age; they are still young, thus they are more physically strong and fit. The younger ones are innocent, yet adventurous who wants to make experiments and try things out. And I think, that is one characteristic a woman is looking for in a life partner, someone who can make her happy and stress-free. Younger men can make a woman stress-free in a way, since young men are stress-free as well. They act as if they don’t have any responsibility and obligation in life. However, not all the time, a woman would be stress-free from her younger partner. The fact that young men are adventurous; he may playful and unfaithful at some time.

I don’t see any bad side of having a relationship with someone older or younger than you are. If other people call it “nasty” seeing you holding hands with a saggy-skinned old lady, it’s fine. Having that kind of situation, being married with an older woman, I think it’s a nice thing. Here it goes, you already have a spouse, you have mother too! Some people may think that you’re a “gold digger” if you are in a relationship with an older man. Yes it’s true that his financial stability is one great factor you consider being with that person, but look at it the other way around, he/ she also benefits from you. That’s only their opinion. It’s true that what matters is the feeling you have for a person, not your age!